BEES?
BEES
I’ve been writing about ACC (amorphous calcium carbonate) in a paper, and I’ve gotten so used to writing ACC over and over that I tried to write “as” and wrote ASS instead.
I’m tempted to turn it in this way.
We’re all the man who has 10,000 books in his library. He has only read one of them, but he’s read it 10,000 times.
sade:
Homeless Chicago man, Ronald Davis, talking about the disgusting way he is treated on a daily basis and his struggles trying to survive on the streets.
A youtube commenter pointed out that if everyone who viewed this video had donated a dollar, the man would be a millionaire. Smh.
I apologize in advance for making you weep again.
Go to a diverse university so that the minority populations are just large enough that people are able to self-segregate
yeah
diversity
mothership
friendhood
One of the great things about Arrested Development coming back is that Maeby looks 10 years older, but Michael Cera just got a little taller.
On her 15th birthday, she realizes one day that there’s something off. She’s not functioning like she used to - tripping over her words, experiencing mood swings that she never had before, forgetting large chunks of her childhood. But she writes it off. It’s just a part of growing up.
On her 20th birthday, she meets her soul mate. They fall in love and are married by her 23rd birthday. She celebrates her 30th birthday with her dog, cat, husband, and two daughters. She is happy. The mood swings are gone, replaced by infrequent headaches and moments of intense passion for ordinary objects.
Two weeks later, she is playing soccer with some other moms, when she takes and elbow to the forehead and sustains a concussion. The doctors discover something unusual in her MRI.
There is a tumor. Or something like it. It’s growing slowly, and there are no signs that metastasis did or will ever occur. The tumor-like thing has been storing her memories for twelve years, ever growing, consuming other brain cells to create more storage. If it continues to grow, she will lose the ability to talk within fifteen years. She will lose motor function in twenty years. In thirty years, she will die with memories of every single event that has happened in her life. If the tumor is removed, she will lose all of her memory from the last fifteen years and be left with the memory of an adolescent. All of college, all of her friends, her husband, and her children will be erased.
A Macbeth adaptation where all the characters are cartoon dogs, and the main character is named Lord Macbark, accompanied by Lady Macbark. Macruff kills Macbark in the final act. Lady Macbark takes a bath, shakes the water out, and discovers that Spot, the court jester is still there, so she says, “Out, damn Spot!”. Three bitches predict the downfall of Macbark.
The whole thing will be grotesquely cute and cutely grotesque.
There once was a time when I put a lot of effort into sending anonymous compliments to Tumblr users because I wanted to make them feel appreciated, but now I just try to make the people around me feel loved
Sometimes I feel like the fact that every person can be unique and important and protected is strange and beautiful because biologically and compositionally, we’re not different from any animal or material or thing, but somehow we manage to treasure each other and bother to learn names and personalities
North Carolina May Declare Official State Religion Under New Bill
Does Huffington Post do satire?
I spilled a drop of water in the middle of my red shirt and thought my chest was bleeding
The Doctor wears Amy’s reading glasses a lot, which is supposed to be all emotional and symbolic of how he hasn’t given her up, but really it’s just unhealthy for his eyes because they’re prescription, and they’re reading glasses, so they’re going to be the wrong prescription for him, and he uses them for distance, which would just give him an unfocused image.
